A day or two after that I was at Janie's and she had just made a big batch of white chocolate chip orange cookies. Again, the first one I had was amazing, but I probably had another 5 or 6 (sorry Janie). By the second or third cookie I was feeling sick but I kept eating them anyway because they were yummy. But not as yummy as the first one.
On Sunday I was at Julie's and she had made M & M cookie bars for dessert. Again, I kept eating and eating them well past the point of feeling sick.
Last night I was remembering those cookie bars, so I went to the store at 9 p.m. to buy the ingredients to make them. They came out of the oven around 10:30, and by 11 Dan and I (mostly I) had eaten half of the 9 x 13 pan. They were nowhere near as yummy as Julie's, but I just kept eating them. We finished them off this morning for breakfast. I've felt sick all day from eating them. But if there were more in the pan right now, I'd go put them in my mouth.
So what is the deal? One thing that I've been trying to learn is that I need to keep desserts out of my house. Even something as innocent as a bag of chocolate chips in the freezer or a box of Cinnamon Toast Crunch on top of the refrigerator is not safe. I cannot stop eating sweets until they're gone, even though they make me sick. And until the sweet food is gone, I won't eat anything else. If I can keep from buying the yummy stuff at the store, I do pretty well. The problem I have with that is when I tell myself that I am depriving my children (or husband), and that I need to make (or buy) them a special treat to show them I love them. I end up eating almost all of the treat and they hardly get any.
Then there are always the kind friends that bring over a plate of cookies, or the lunches and dinners at other people's houses, complete with dessert! Not to mention refreshments at church events, Valentine's Day, Easter, Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, etc. etc. etc.
It feels sort of like I'm an alcoholic who can't control her drinking. Some people can have just one, but I have to get plastered. Is there a way I could learn to eat just one serving, and then stop, really stop, or will I have to learn to refrain completely? Bingeing on desserts does not fall under the heading of healthy lifestyle practices. Has anyone else out there had this problem? Have you found anything that helps you?